sadnessandpuns:

On my tombstone please write “Not appreciating my puns when I was alive was a grave mistake”

graveyard-strutter:

radiicvl:

plhants:

morgancrawf:

official-maximum-ride:

Decided to take a video while flying this morning.

Best. Idea. Ever.

perfection

Reminder that this actually exists in our world


THIS IS REAL

I’m gonna cry.

i just read this and thought “humans cant fly dont lie to me sir” then realised, airplanes. 

"Maximum Ride" is a fictional character that can fly. The Maximum Ride series by James Patterson is a YA novel whose marketing strategy includes giving the characters a very strong online presence. That includes active social media accounts for most of them.

(via black--lamb)

larrydavidofficial:

my entire life

(Source: nobodylikespete, via theofficialariel)

antlor:

people who hate on flannel are not worth your time, you OWN that lumberjack look and chop down the haters

(via shouldbedoingsomethingproductive)

theouatgifs:

When we met, I wasn’t just unloved and unloving. I was an enemy of love. Love had only brought me pain. My walls were up, but you brought them down. You brought me home.

(via captainswanouat)

thenamesmadlibbs:

The little mermaid 

(via rapunzelie)

Things I should have done today: given my number to the cute guy at the olive oil store

Things I really should have done today: fixed my work schedule and given my number to the cute guy at the olive oil store.

whowasntthere:

arkhamsmaddness:

Just a fun little project I am working on for my “Time City” Project this is meant to be a poster for my fictional world but really this is very good information.

“I really think it’s crazy that we hit our kids. Here’s the crazy part about it; kids are the only people in the world that you’re allowed to hit. Do you realize that? They’re the most vulnerable and the most destroyed by being hit but it’s totally OK to hit them. And they’re the only ones! if you hit a dog they will put you in jail for that shit. You can’t hit a person unless you can prove that they were trying to kill you. But a little tiny person with a head this big who trusts you implicitly:

‘FUCK ‘EM, WHO GIVES A SHIT! LET’S ALL HIT THEM!’ 

People want you to hit your kid. If your kid is making noise:

‘HIT HIM!!!! HIT ‘EM!!!! GRRRRRR’

That’s what people say -

“You damn right I hit my kids!”.

Why do you hit them?

“-cause they were doing a thing I didn’t like at the moment and so I hit them and guess what? They didn’t do it after that”.

Well that wouldn’t be taking the fucking easy way out would it? How about talking to them for a second you fucking asshole? What are you, an idiot? What are you, a fucking ape?

“Well he’s a pain in the ass so-“

Well you fucked a woman and a baby came out of her vagina, so you be patient!

-Louis C.K. 

Confession time

Before I leave the house I always ask my mother for outfit approval first. She and I may disagree on many things, but her fashion sense is ten thousand percent on point and I’ll be damned if I’m not tapping into that well of stylish knowledge.